Firstly, I like this picture.

“And so when the evening was over, there was no lingering, just a polite good night. She stood there silent, glass of wine in her hands, with a look of puzzlement on her face,” he recalls. “As the doors closed, it hit me like a ton of bricks that she was shocked that I hadn’t followed her back to her room. The next day was awkward between us.”

According to researchers at Indiana University and Yale University, this guy isn’t the only man flying blind. Women are better than men at interpreting facial expressions and body language, according to the study. “Men are more direct. They pay more attention to what is said, not how it’s said.”

Case in point: If a woman is giving “I’m interested” signals — touching a man on the arm, for example, or maintaining eye contact and smiling while talking — but then talks about how she’s not really interested in dating, the man’s going to believe her words, not her actions. I definitely think women give guys mixed signals, and it is almost always because our niceness in trying to let them down easy is confused with interest.

Well….I’m as confused as any other guy when it comes to deciphering the level of interest of a woman so I employed a few friends and sources to help me write this blog post. Here are some tips to use in discerning whether or not she’s interested | Disclaimer: please do not immediately cut off all the women in your phonebook because one or two of these applies

1. Fairly and appropriately evaluate each of your first few dates (if you get past date #1).

Don’t let your thirst get the best of you. AskMen.com says….

You don’t know what you have in common with a chick after just one encounter. What you have in common is nothing more than physical attraction. That’s all. How do you know she’s such a “great girl”? You just met her, didn’t you? So how could you possibly know? She might have a good job, but how does she function in romantic relationships? That’s what counts. Sure, you’re attracted to her — but how attracted is she to you? Is she really available? Those are the critical questions. Like my cousin Fast Eddie Love from East L.A. says: “You’re dying to admire anything that’s not bad about this girl!”

2. If she continuously cancels on you, she’s not interested.

You are the fall back guy, the just-in-case-she-doesn’t-have-anything-better-to-do guy. It’s all good to cancel occasionally for a legitimate reason, but if she bails consistently, ditch her, maybe even as a friend. If she does this, it not only shows that she’s not interested, but that she holds little respect for you or your time. Move on homie…

Note: make sure to differentiate between canceling and bluffing. In order for it to be considered a true “cancel” you both must have agreed to meet up at a specified time on a specified date.

2.5 She’s mad/hella vague about making plans

If you propose a firm plan and she avoids it…hmm. If she really wants to see you, she’ll make firm plans. If she doesn’t want to see you or doesn’t care one way or another, you can be pretty sure that she’s not into you. If she is vague about making plans, it probably means that she is neutral about being in your company, or even worse, that she doesn’t want to commit in case something better comes up. Pow.

3. “I’m not ready for a relationship right now.”

Guys love using this one too. It’s a clean phrase, requires no preparation and leaves no room for a counterargument. If you’re just looking to hit it and quit it, then you’re good. If you’re looking to wife her up, then you should run. What she really means is that she does not want to be in a relationship with you. For whatever reason, she doesn’t see you as relationship material for her, so don’t stick around hoping she will be ready someday. She might get into a relationship eventually, but it probably won’t be with you.

4. You’re always the one calling/texting/BBMing/Skyping her, and she doesn’t reply your calls/texts/BBMs/Skypes.

No brainer. Guys do this one too. You really shouldn’t be fooled by the same tricks you use on others. That’s like a car salesman paying MSRP for a new whip.

4.5 Isabella says:

Even a brain surgeon can make time to message someone. If the woman you lust after takes a day or, God forbid, two to get back to you, she’s probably not that into you. Don’t get me wrong, she might be as busy as she says she is. Many women are. But if a woman likes a man, she will make time for him, no matter what.

5. She avoids eye contact and physical proximity.

I thought this was a no brainer until I was recently confronted by a girl who said she had been interested in the past……but never got closer than arms reach, never returned calls, and rarely maintained eye contact for longer than a split second. My response: “Act like it’s gum in your hair girl….cut it out”

6. She hooks you up with her friend.

Don’t be a fool dude. She’s prob not just trying to make you jealous if she introduces you to her girl. There are only two explanations for this. One, she wants to keep you in the friend zone. Two, it never crossed her mind that anything could come out of it. Another Pow.

7. She doesn’t laugh at your jokes.

This is really bad. Even the wackest of the wackest of the wackest dudes will get a laugh if the girl likes them. Whether or not she laughs at your jokes doesn’t necessarily have to do with whether or not she finds them funny. Laughing is a form of flirting, and if she isn’t doing it, you can be pretty sure she’s not feeling you.

8. She never asks you to go into details (as they pertain to you)

In other words, she doesn’t want to know anything about you. Her: “how was your weekend?” You: “wild as hell. went to my boy’s bachelor party” Her: “oh that’s nice” #FAIL!!!

9. Take it as gold if another woman tells you she’s into you

Isabella also says: The easiest way to tell if a hottie is into you, is to ask another woman. We have a built-in radar for this kind of thing, and it’s just never wrong. Seriously. Arrange some kind of meeting – Starbucks, perhaps – with you, the hottie and a female friend of yours. By the end of the ‘date’ you’ll have your answer. BUT!!!!!! Be sure the hottie knows the side chick is just a friend and not an actual “side chick”, otherwise that’ll be you sending mixed signals.

10. She calls/texts/BBMs/Skypes for no reason

In other words, she’s not hittin you up to find out if you can fix her car, to find out if you can loan her some cash, or to find out if you can paint her living room pink. She’s calling just to chat. This is the #1 sign of someone who’s interested in you.

Warning: Beware of the FRIEND ZONE. So if she’s chatting away like you’re one of the girls, this is NOT a sign she’s into you.

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